Girls: How to Tell a Guy You Like Him

Often, some girls find it very difficult to ask a guy out.

Some girls keep waiting to be asked out.
Some girls keep waiting to be asked out.
Even in this modern era when equality between men and women has been greatly increased, many women have been unable to make the first move or even express their feelings to the men they like[1]. However, good news are slowly arriving as our culture evolves rapidly.

Why can’t girls ask guys out?

Ladies can ask guys out, but there are really more problems with that than when guys ask girls out. This could be due to the historical gender role culture that existed globally, in which the ladies were considered as great treasures that men should be appreciative of having and should handle with care and respect, such as when men were socially required to remove their hats in the presence of women[2]. But however this has come to be, there needs to be a way out of it for the girls — I mean the fact that a girl has to wait to be asked out.

How to ask a guy out

In a dating advice conference, a girl asked, “can I ask a guy out?” And another asked later, “how do I tell the guy I like that I like him?” For the first question the answer is obviously yes. But for the second one, well, the answer is somewhat easy but difficult to deliver. Here’s what you should do:

First, you should not be afraid of rejection, as this is usually what hinders girls from making the first move, thus having to wait and wait. Don’t do that. He will either say yes or no, which is what you would also answer if someone guy asks you out.
The big problem in this world is that it is somewhat a taboo for a girl to ask a guy out (some may believe or think that the girl is slutty).
I’m a guy and I would usually run away from any girl that asks me out, and afterwards I would have no more respect for the girl ever again. But this is the opposite for my male friends. Trust me, some guys are looking for whatever they can get, which means that they may value girls that ask them out.

Also, there are guys who are so picky, but might accept a girl who asks them out, if the girl meets their standards.
The bottom line is, do not be afraid. Just ask him out in case he might have some feeling for you as well. The only way you can find out is by asking him out now before another girl does and he accepts her, giving you a longtime emotional pain.
A friend once said in a conversation on this topic, “Out of five times that I’ve ever asked girls out, I was rejected once. I thought I would have been rejected by all of them, even though I secretly cried for that one time that I was rejected.”

So you’ve really got nothing to lose by making the first move. It’s always a hit or miss when you try, but always a miss when you don’t.
What to say to him? Any of these might work:

Would you go out with me?
Would you go out with me if I asked you out?
Wanna go out?
Wanna go out with me?
I think I like you.
I think I like you. Let’s go out.
I think I like you. Wanna go out?

Showing him signs you like him

While some people say this strategy is awesome[3], I personally don’t think it is as effective as it is made to seem. For example if all a girl does when she sees me is flirt or show all sorts of signs, I would simply assume she’s only being flirty. But still, this is just me, and many other guys may be different. My tip is that you should actually ask out the guy you really like or love.

Does it matter where you met him?

No. Whether you met the guy at college, club, travel, tourism, meetup etc, the result would still be either yes or no when you ask him out. The exception is at work where you may get in trouble if flirting and display of affection are not celebrated there.

Good luck, and share your thoughts by commenting below if you have tried asking a guy out before, and what the outcome was. Guys can share their thoughts too!


Photo credit: zoetnet

References
[1] “Why Don’t Women Ask Men Out on First Dates?” Mills, Michael. Psychology Today. Retrieved Apr 9 2013 <http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-how-and-why-sex-differences/201104/why-dont-women-ask-men-out-first-dates>.
[2] “Etiquette of hat wearing for men.” Many Hatty Returns. Retrieved Apr 9 2013 <http://www.manyhattyreturns.com/2010/08/10/etiquette-of-hat-wearing-for-men/>.
[3] “Why Don’t Women Ask Men Out on First Dates?” Mills, Michael. Psychology Today. Retrieved Apr 9 2013 <http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-how-and-why-sex-differences/201104/why-dont-women-ask-men-out-first-dates>.

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